You Shouldn't Read This
This will likely be a rambling, uneven, unfunny, and generally worthless collection of words bemoaning the evils of the world. Consider yourselves forewarned.
I taught the class tonight. They took a test, and then we practiced their CPR skills for a while. Infant, child, and adult CPR, plus airway obstruction stuff. Almost mind-numbingly boring. On top of that, the one person I really wouldn'tve minded spending some portion of my Valentine's evening with was already engaged, and unavailable.
During the test I spent some time watching one of the girls in the class, who I really enjoy watching almost all the time. Not because she's attractive (She is, don't get me wrong) but because her facial expressions are the single funniest thing I've ever seen. She just reacts to everything going on around her with the most ridiculous expressions. Tonight while she was taking the test, I almost burst out laughing several times when I looked over and caught her furrowing her eyebrows and blowing her lips out. Maybe it's just funny to me, I don't know.
I just erased 2 paragraphs about nothing but relationship bullshit. I refuse to put my hypothetical reader through the gauntlet of my romantic inadequacies. Sorry.
Do you remember the first time you woke up next to someone? For me it's the smell of her shampoo. That's what stands out for me in the memory of every woman I've known. (Ladies take note). Then you slowly regain consciousness, and recognize that there's something warm in your bed, and it's attractive simply for its warmth. So you snuggle up close, and lo and behold, this warm thing is soft, and female, and she makes the most beautiful noise you've ever heard when you wrap your arms around her. That really nice, contented sigh.
That is something I don't like living without.
So much for not putting my inadequacies out there.
Haha. I forgot. I made the entire class perform the Heimlich maneuver on one another tonight. Maybe one of the most brilliant things I've ever done. One girl actually squeaked when the guy squeezed her. Hilarious.
I'm considering going downstairs and popping a beer while I watch whatever bad late-night TV is on, but as long as the gorgeous girl with whom I might be making a mistake will talk to me, (Hereafter: GG) I can't tear myself away. That story is too long to put up on here, but just trust me when I say I might be making a big mistake. She just signed off though, so beer it is. I hope Cops is on. There's no better late-night TV than Cops.
I promise that whatever goes up here next won't be this uninteresting, and will actually have something worth reading in it.
But I did warn you.
I taught the class tonight. They took a test, and then we practiced their CPR skills for a while. Infant, child, and adult CPR, plus airway obstruction stuff. Almost mind-numbingly boring. On top of that, the one person I really wouldn'tve minded spending some portion of my Valentine's evening with was already engaged, and unavailable.
During the test I spent some time watching one of the girls in the class, who I really enjoy watching almost all the time. Not because she's attractive (She is, don't get me wrong) but because her facial expressions are the single funniest thing I've ever seen. She just reacts to everything going on around her with the most ridiculous expressions. Tonight while she was taking the test, I almost burst out laughing several times when I looked over and caught her furrowing her eyebrows and blowing her lips out. Maybe it's just funny to me, I don't know.
I just erased 2 paragraphs about nothing but relationship bullshit. I refuse to put my hypothetical reader through the gauntlet of my romantic inadequacies. Sorry.
Do you remember the first time you woke up next to someone? For me it's the smell of her shampoo. That's what stands out for me in the memory of every woman I've known. (Ladies take note). Then you slowly regain consciousness, and recognize that there's something warm in your bed, and it's attractive simply for its warmth. So you snuggle up close, and lo and behold, this warm thing is soft, and female, and she makes the most beautiful noise you've ever heard when you wrap your arms around her. That really nice, contented sigh.
That is something I don't like living without.
So much for not putting my inadequacies out there.
Haha. I forgot. I made the entire class perform the Heimlich maneuver on one another tonight. Maybe one of the most brilliant things I've ever done. One girl actually squeaked when the guy squeezed her. Hilarious.
I'm considering going downstairs and popping a beer while I watch whatever bad late-night TV is on, but as long as the gorgeous girl with whom I might be making a mistake will talk to me, (Hereafter: GG) I can't tear myself away. That story is too long to put up on here, but just trust me when I say I might be making a big mistake. She just signed off though, so beer it is. I hope Cops is on. There's no better late-night TV than Cops.
I promise that whatever goes up here next won't be this uninteresting, and will actually have something worth reading in it.
But I did warn you.
posted by C at 11:59 PM
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